Parents My Best Teachers And Friends

Introduction

There is a strong influence of caregiving in a child's life. When the caregiving has care, kindness, responsiveness, it greatly influences a child's personality as well. Whether it is family or school, they must be treated with respect. My cousin told me once, “Child doesn’t know anything, they won’t even realize how we treat them. Why are you putting so much pressure on you?” I was stunned, they have a heart that hurts when we don’t treat or care them properly.

I have a 7month old daughter, she will cry when she needs a diaper change but when she sees a diaper in my hand, she will smile. From this we can understand they know everything. The relationship with them should make them feel safe in the environment they are in.

Parent Interview

For this interview, I contacted a parent (she is my friend). As we are at home and can’t go and see her, I FaceTimed her for this interview.

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Her son’s name is Shubh, he is 2 years old. He is enrolled currently in the toddler program. She is more than happy to help me in this assignment.

Discipline program

The parent replied, “they don’t impose any harsh discipline practices. They explain consequences of the action, if children hit, bite, push. They also try to be positive always. Once Shubh pushed his classmate, the child didn’t get hurt. They told me to talk to him at home about this and tell him it's wrong”.

Effectiveness:

She replied, “Yes, it's effective. I don’t expect him to learn immediately, he is young for that. But I feel he will learn if the teachers or parents keep on insisting positive behavior. But I feel stressed when he or someone expresses the behavior like pushing, biting, kicking. I’m scared that the child may get hurt and I’m answerable to the child’s parents if he behaves like that. His father says, he will learn soon, he is just a child and why do you want to force him to learn everything this soon.

I asked, “Do you think he will learn by himself and this is soon?”

No. i don’t think he will learn. Even if he learns it will take a long time, I can’t wait for another year thinking that he will learn. We must teach them good and bad.

Individual learning needs

When I asked her this question she immediately said, “No”. “I don’t think they give proper attention to every child’s needs. They never ask for my opinion and if I tell them any concerns about him they say they will look for it but never cares. I’m not happy about it. They just run as a daycare and he goes there just to eat and sleep.”

Why are you sending him to this school then? You can change his school if you are not happy.

“It’s nearby and they charge less. He is young as well. I’ll change once he is three and half years old. Let him go there now.”

Parental involvement

She said, “they encourage parents to be a volunteer. I join them during field trips. They ask for how he behaves in home, what can be done to improve his behavior, sleep pattern.”

Communication

She said, “It’s very good. I usually go to parents-teachers meetings that happen once a month. If there is something really important they will inform during pick-up/drop-off time. Also, the teachers are very friendly, that makes me free to talk to them. Sometimes, I'll call the office to talk to them. They will send pamphlets and emails about things happening in school.”

Types of activities

She said she was not sure about it. But they have show and tell, will have group activities and they read books about friendship, anti-bullying etc.

Have you ever thought of social skills?

No lakshmi. They will learn as they grow. What is there to teach them this. Also, he is playing with his classmates which means he is getting along well.

Issue or concern

Yes she replied. She added, “once Shubh fell down and got hurt in his chin. He was bleeding and they gave him just a plaster and didn’t call me. I asked in the evening why they didn’t inform me in the morning itself, I would have taken him to hospital. They replied, they didn;t feel it was necessary as it was not that worrisome. They said, he fell down while playing and no one pushed or something. I didn’t say anything because my husband asked me to leave it”.

You should have reported it to the director

She said, “I told her and also told her to inform me if something happens like this again”.

Teacher Interview

I interviewed a teacher that works with me in preschool class. She is teaching children aged 4-5 years old.

Discipline program

She told me, “I always keep discipline plans simple in the classroom. I won’t use negative words while disciplining them. I have set clear limits on usage of words. I use timeout techniques as well. No child is treated harshly and I don’t show my anger when they don’t behave well. They know their clear limits. When they are interrupting the class or hitting, pushing happens, I’ll ask them to sit beside me and they can’t talk with anyone for 10mins.

It is a social skill that has to be taught to children, it may be frustrating at times (Gonzalez-Mena & Widmeyer Eyer 2015). It is ok to pause and try again when it is challenging. The child must know the impact of their actions.

Individual learning needs

Teacher said, “families input is essential in this. In our center we have a form with questions about children. Some won’t be comfortable in writing, so I’ll talk with parents to know their family, culture, and interests. This will help me develop plans for them. Also, in our school they will conduct a developmental screening prior to admission.”

Lally, J. R., & Mangione, P. L. 2006 says, teachers must be aware of the child in whole. Some children may be from different cultures and teachers must understand their culture, respect them. Children can lag in academics, special attention must be given to them.

Parental involvement

She said, “parents can tell their view about curriculum. They can be a volunteer, can take some special class in which they are good at. E.g. I have a parent who comes in every week an hour to teach spanish to children. Another parent teaches robotics to kindergarten students. Also, we send some information on potty training, sleeping disorders and will ask parents to follow them and if they find any difficulty we are there to help them.”

Lally J. R. 2000 says, parents must take part in activities in school. It is not only attending meetings, it’s about helping in class, field trips.

Communication

Teacher said, “We often inform the parents about their child. We also send photos of their everyday activity through an app that we have. Also, during pick-up, drop-off time we talk to parents. Parents sometimes tell their concerns during this time or they can use the app to message us their concerns, needs. They can make an appointment with teachers and can talk. These many types of communications methods we have in our center.”

According to Gonzalez-Mena & Widmeyer Eyer 2015, communication is vital in a child's development. Parents must know what is happening, how the child is behaving, what he is learning in school and teachers must know what is happening at home. Only then teachers and parents can help them grow.

Types of activities

“There are a lot of activities everyday for it. We make them talk more and want them to understand others feelings and emotions. We make them take turns, group play, talk about his friend, talk about something for 5mins, these are some of what we do”, she said.

According to Pellegrini AD, Dupuis D, and Smith PK. 2007, social skills are vital to get along in a place with others. They can make some connections, share ideas, make friendships through developing social skills. Some are very good at it and some children may be shy and get nervous when they are with unknown people. For problem solving, being empathetic, making friends, being generous and helpful, children need these social skills (Pellegrini AD, Dupuis D, and Smith PK. 2007).

Issue or concern

She said, “atleast once a week or once in two months this happens. Have to talk to parents about their behavior, word they use in class. E.g. a week before a child in TK was not behaving properly and the assistant director was trying to talk to him about it. He was telling eveyone that he is gonna marry them. So she wanted to talk about it to him in private and in front of everyone he called her using the ‘B’ word and we all were shocked to be frank. We called his parents right away and informed them about this and wanted them to have a meeting with us in the evening the same day probably.”

“The parents were cool and his father said he might have learned it from his elder brothers. He has two. He said he would talk about it to him and just said I’m sorry and went”, she told me. She added, teachers talked to him after that and explained to him it’s not right to use those words and it hurts. He asked sorry the next day it seems but they were not happy that the parents were not much concerned about it.

Flook L., Goldberg S.B., Pinger L., and Davidson R.J. 2015 says, children must be taught to behave properly in school. They learn from adults around them, if we behave properly, use the proper words, they are going to grow well (Flook L., Goldberg S.B., Pinger L., and Davidson R.J. 2015). Sometimes, it is difficult to handle situations. But the teacher must be patient, kind and calm when concerns arise. Being angry doesn’t help these situations (Flook L., Goldberg S.B., Pinger L., and Davidson R.J. 2015).