If I Could Change The World

Nothing is forever. No matter how hard we try, as time passes, everything changes, however, I often wonder if the change is always for the better. Our society prides itself on the advancements that we’ve made in the last few years. Our medical procedures are more accurate than ever, and we find ourselves surrounded by child prodigies. However, we also find ourselves surrounded by depressed teens, broken families, and an overabundance of mental health issues. But why is this? The last time I checked, most of us are living a cushy lifestyle where the hardest choice we have to make is how to eat our granola in the morning.

Despite the many triumphs we’ve made in the world of technology, we’ve unintentionally set ourselves back in the social realm.

Instead of providing children with a healthy, thriving environment, we’ve employed insufficient ways of raising our children. Not only has this created a community full of emotionally and mentally stunted individuals, but we are failing to shape our future into the best it could be, and some of this can be attributed to the way we parent.

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The use of helicopter parenting has to lead to a spike in mental health issues and a decrease in social interaction.

But before diving into different facts and fragments of research from well-renowned authors, what is helicopter parenting? This type of parenting doesn’t consist of checking in now and again or being that one parent who tries to show up to all the games but instead takes these to extremes.

An every so often check to turn into every hour check-ins, and that supporting mom at the soccer game turns into the mom who runs down the field with their child — hovering over their every move like a helicopter.

It’s not as if parents intentionally try to employ this parenting style, they simply just want the best for their child. However, their obsessiveness and constant need to care for someone leads to these kids relying so heavily on their parents that they lack the ability to function as an individual — no matter the situation. Studies have shown that those born from 1980 till now have been more reluctant to move off to college, and continue to develop issues when it comes to adulting (van Ingen et al. 2015). These select individuals find that they cannot perform simple tasks without assistance, and fail to mature into responsible adults who possess some of the necessary skills associated with adulthood.

Alongside this overwhelming fear of being off on their own, children are also growing up without their own set of values. This is because, while under the supervision of their parents, most of their values and morals are based on what their parents believe. And, “These [values] have a powerful impact on behavior, even if parents are ... unaware of that impact,” states Dr. Grusec during her discussion about how parenting can impact childhood development (Grusec and Danyliuk, 2014). Or in other words, parents are unintentionally preventing their children from defining themselves because they are so heavily influenced for the majority of their lives. For example, children don't start to stray away from their childhood beliefs until they're older because they finally have a chance to experience their life how they choose — without supervision. Children can only discover what truly interests them when they're allowed to pursue what they choose instead of what they're told.

Not only are children told what to do and what to like — but they're also told what to learn instead of learning for themselves. This is not to be confused with being somewhat self-taught because we shouldn't have to learn everything on our own, however, it's beneficial to our development to be somewhat self-educated because it teaches us one of the most vital lessons in life: our actions have consequences (Gale Opposing Viewpoints, 2017). By being told that we shouldn't touch the fireplace when it's on, we fail to learn the consequences of our actions and while no one likes to burn themselves, it allows for the child to associate pain with bad instead of bad with Something my mom says. By being allowed to teach ourselves growing up, we can continue that self-learning beyond high school, and throughout our lives — regardless of our parents are there or not.

Some people believe that the old ways of parenting no longer prove to be as effective as they used to be, and that time calls for a change. This is true because we're surrounded by individuals with different personalities, there are “...changes in workplaces, homes, and schools that have led to more decision-making by committee,” and we need to try and embrace differences instead of pushing them away (Strauss, 2018). And, with a different society, it is expected that our view on ethics will change as well. For example, it's no longer acceptable for children to walk to the park alone, or let their kid cry it out. Instead, we've deemed it necessary that a more hands-on approach should be taken when it comes to raising your child. However, we overestimated how hands-on we need to be, and produced a society full of overly cautious individuals, and find ourselves relying on insufficient parenting methods.