The Counselling Process

The counselling process is based on the exchange of emotions between the client and the counsellor which aims to form an alliance (Hough, 1998). It involves the counsellor using skills in which they possess in order to communicate effectively with clients (Hough, 1998). This reflective essay clearly articulates my application of counselling skills used in this practice session and suggestions for improvement. It will provide a summary of the session, identification of a range of skills used and a brief explanation of the reasons for using the skill.

It will also provide an evaluation of my application of the skills chosen, including verbatim examples, suggestions for improvement, also including verbatim examples to demonstrate what could have been said or done and an overall reflection of my effectiveness as a counsellor and the implications for future reference. My client met with me for 20 minutes to discuss an issue she had based on her sense of balance in relation to her study and other commitments.

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She felt it wasn’t going very well and she came to counselling to talk about strategies that would make her life easier.

During the session I tried to demonstrate skills learnt in counselling skills 1 and 2. The skills that I reflect on include non verbal communication, development of rapport, active listening, paraphrasing and open ended questions. My use of non verbal communication was effective as I greeted my client with a positive hand shake and a smile to ensure security when entering the room. I feel I succeeded in my active listening skills as I demonstrated my listening through non verbal eye contact and nodding.

I paraphrased my client’s statements effectively to demonstrate my understanding of her issue.

However, I feel I needed to decrease the amount of times I stroked my hair and used negative expressions to ensure my security and confidence towards my client. I also needed to be aware of how I asked my open ended questions by excluding questions beginning with the word ‘why’. Finally I needed to be clear and concise when terminating and reflecting on the session. At the beginning of the counselling session, I tried to adopt an open and positive attitude towards my client. I demonstrated this by employing the use of non verbal communication to assist in the creation of the joining relationship.

Non verbal communication refers to communication without words (DeVito, 2010). Joining with a client refers to a meaningful and constructive relationship that has developed with a counsellor and a client (Armstrong, 2006). The most crucial part of the joining process occurs within the first 60 seconds of meeting the client (Armstrong, 2006). Within seconds of meeting my client, I greeted her with a positive hand shake and a smile. As a counsellor moves towards the client to greet them, this will in some way affect their feelings towards the counsellor and their confidence inside them (Geldard & Geldard, 2001).

I decided to use non verbal messages towards my client to ensure comfort when entering a new environment. I also thought by demonstrating these messages I would establish a sense of rapport. Rapport refers to the harmonious communication between a client and their counsellor (Hough, 1998). By using the usual person-to-person encounter, expressing equality, I thought my client would feel secure when ready to communicate. It was effective as she responded with the usual positive hand shake and smile. Further along in the session, I felt I was using a skill known as active listening.

Active listening refers to the observation of the client’s non verbal behaviour as well as the understanding of their verbal content and meaning (Hough, 1998). I demonstrated this through verbal and non verbal communication. I tried to monitor her feedback and secured my attention with the use of my focused eye communication. Eye contact is considered to be an expression of genuineness and honesty and when glancing directly at one’s face; this demonstrates a high interest in the interaction (DeVito, 2010).

I was nodding when my client was explaining her issue and I made use of minimal expressions. A good way to let a client know you are listening is by the use of minimal responses including expressions and non verbal responses that occur in our everyday conversations (Geldard & Geldard, 2001). For example at the beginning of the session my client said “... , Sometimes I feel I choose my job or something else in my life over my uni... ” I replied by nodding and made use of the expression “Mm-hmm”.

I demonstrated this skill to allow the client to speak without interruptions and to verbally express my interest in her issue. Another skill I used within this session is a technique also known as paraphrasing. Paraphrasing refers to stating in one’s own words what they think the client means helping to ensure their understanding and interest in the client (DeVito, 2010). I felt that I demonstrated this when the client said “As the term progresses I get lazier, but at the beginning of the semester I am productive, and it feels rewarding when I do, do well nd I feel better about myself and everyone is proud of me as well when I get the results and stuff, but there’s this thing that comes into my mind that said I can’t do this and maybe I start rethinking about staying in uni and I start considering dropping it, so I can have more free time. ”

I reply by saying “Ok so you are saying that it is kind of a relief when the work is done, however you are finding it hard to kind of keep up, and maybe you don’t have the will power or the drive to continue this planning all the way through the semester. ” The client replied saying “Ye that’s right... I demonstrated this skill to ensure the meaning of my client’s statement was true, resulting in a positive response. During the session I noticed I demonstrated a hair stroking gesture. According to Eunson (2008) the hair stroking gesture is a shorthand way of showing insecurity. I felt that I was feeling a bit nervous at the beginning of the session only due to the recording taking place. I need to be self aware about how I come across to the speaker and how the speaker interprets my non verbal behaviour (Brems, 2001). For future reference, to allow the speaker to discern easily, I need to decrease hand gestures.

Moreover, I found when I was communicating verbally I would use an insecure expression such as “umm... ” a number of times during the session. I was a little nervous at the beginning; however as the session progressed my use of that expression did decrease demonstrating I was feeling more confident in what I was saying and through the positive responses from my client. In time and through experience, this feeling will pass as I grow and develop, however I will need to hide my feelings so I can build a stronger relationship with my client.

In addition, I found I made use of open ended questions throughout the session. Open ended questions explore the clients issue in greater depth (Hough, 1998). I demonstrated this when I asked “What is it that makes you feel that you can’t do it? ” My client was then able to explore her reasons for the word “cant” by responding “I don’t know, I just feel when the term progresses I get lazier... ” I feel this allowed her to explore her main area in relation to her issue. However, later on in the session I asked “Why do you think you can’t continue this behaviour for the rest of the semester? According to Geldard & Geldard (2001) in response to such questions clients tend to look for an intellectually thought out response, rather than centring on what is occurring internally. To allow the client to elaborate for future reference I could ask “What is it that is stopping you from continuing this behaviour all the way through the semester? ” During the session I tried to help my client develop a strategy for enabling a better future. Strategies are actions that help clients to accomplish their goals (Egan, 2010). When my client said “...

I feel it may also be that I am worried about coming home and doing my work on the computer and getting headaches and migraines... ” I asked my client “Have you ever considered checking your eyes at the optometrist? ” She replied by saying “Yea I have... and they said everything is alright... ” I then replied “Let’s try to explore some other options here, how about instead of using the computer all the time, maybe you can try and print out all of your readings for the semester, rather than using the computer as your resource, use writing pads and paper...

She responded by saying “That’s a good idea actually, it’s funny that you said that because at the beginning of the semester... I spent time at the library printing off all my readings and all my learning guides and I sort of bound them professionally so then I can be organised... but I didn’t think of it in the context of not being on the computer to help with my migraines... ” When exploring options with my client I found it was effective as she agreed with the new strategy and said she had put it in place for other reasons, however it made her realise it was a useful tool for this issue.

Moreover, I attempted to conclude the session by specifying a time and reflecting on what was discussed, however I feel I didn’t end the session well and my closing statement wasn’t clear. I ended the session by saying “We have a couple of minutes left; I hope we can continue this in the next coming session, but I hope we have kind of resolved something today. We have had our options open with the prioritising thing, at least we know now that it is about prioritising, so we need to try and structure that and say this is my first priority... nd once that is stuck in your head then hopefully we can progress and next time after you try these strategies at home and it still isn’t working then we can fall back on ways in which you can open up your time... ”

It is sometimes important for the counsellor to provide a summary of the information discussed by the client to serve as a natural ending (Geldard & Geldard, 2001). Prior to concluding the session I felt another topic was introduced too late when the client said “That’s been really helpful, maybe we just find a way to prioritise my stuff” I replied by saying “...

With prioritising, in your life what is highest on your list? ” It is important to avoid introducing new subjects at this stage, and if the client introduces a different topic or to extend the topic, schedule this for discussion in the next session (Hough, 1998). I could have ended the session without appearing intrusive or insensitive if I said “We have ten minutes left. Maybe we could look at what you have said so far, and highlight any points which you would like to talk about in your next session. ” I feel this would have given a more clear termination to the session and would have provided a clear and concise summary.

Upon reflection of the session, I believe my strengths lie in my ability to develop and maintain rapport. This was evident when I greeted the client using verbal and non verbal communication skills. I demonstrated a non verbal hand shake and smile to ensure my client’s comfort and security when entering a new environment. I believe my strengths also lie in the use of active listening. I demonstrated this through the use of non verbal eye contact and nodding when the client was speaking and through the use of paraphrasing.

My learning edge is to be able to sit comfortably without too many hair stroking gestures and insecure verbal expressions to allow the client to feel that she isn’t being disturbed. Finally I need to ensure I conclude my session demonstrating a clear termination and concise summary. In conclusion, during the session I used a range of skills learnt in counselling skills 1 and 2. I demonstrated the use of a non verbal handshake and smile when greeting my client ensuring security and the establishment of rapport.

I was able to demonstrate active listening when nodding and maintaining eye contact. I condensed my client statements showing my true understanding when paraphrasing. However, I needed to ensure I decreased insecure verbal and non verbal expressions to ensure the comfort of my client. I also felt I needed to choose the correct way in asking an open ended question, without using the word ‘why’ demonstrating my initial focus on her issue alone. Lastly I needed to correctly conclude my session by clearly and concisely summarising my client’s issue.