Overcoming Failure's Influence: A Personal Account

If the ocean has no wind, then it has no waves. Men are afraid of ocean because of its everlasting waves. My life was merely an empty story until challenges appeared and woke me up.–Hoang Tran

Perhaps, people often face difficult time and feel helpless when they fail to accomplish a plan or achieve a certain goal. Indeed, failure is unavoidable in this world. Yet, some simply cannot accept the temporary pain, and thus give up hope for the future; this is when pessimism takes place and silently destroys a person's confidence and passion in his or her other plans and ambitions.

And when the spirit for those plans and ambitions dies out, a person's identity becomes fluctuated, since questions like "Who am I" or "What I should I do next" will not stop flying in that person's head. In other word, failure is of the most significant impacts that vigorously affects a person's identity.

Finding a solution to cure the impact that failure has on a person is not easy at all; however, sometimes, once one found his or her special treatment to duel with failure, his or her identity is more than likely redefined, of course, in a better and more mature way.

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I have experienced that period—a period of depression and emptiness: At the beginning of the soccer's season in my high school, I was kicked out from the Varsity soccer team, after days of terribly jaded practices under all types of weather for try-out, to go back to the JV team, where I used to play during my sophomore's and junior's year.

A generally archetypal, yet valuable, teaching states like this, "No pain, no gain.”

In truth, if a person does not accrue enough life experiences, both sweet and bitter, his or her assumed identity is not the real identity that he or she should have had. If we fail because we have not tried enough, the pain may be temporary. If we fail because an incident occurs during the most excited time of our goals, the anguish is bitterly unforgettable.

In 2009, I was an enthusiastic and passionate senior in Monte Vista Christian School. At first, every morning I went to class happily, since we the Senior Class-had many privileges. We got dismissed early for lunch in some classes, a nice lounge for the senior only, cheaper tickets for school's events and many other things. However, Mr. Revas, the new biology teacher and the new head coach for the soccer team this year, helped me realized that there was no significant difference between me and the under classmates. "Don't tell me because you are a senior, you are legitimate to go to Varsity" was the first thing that he told us at the first day of try-out. High competitions occurred regularly during those practices. Players tried their best to impress the coach. I had spent my utmost efforts showing up earlier, running faster, and playing harder during those practices.

Perseverance often has its reward, and I was chosen as one of the Varsity players. After two years of observing the Varsity team played on the main field with jealousy, I spoke to myself: This is my time to shine. Nevertheless, I was too early to my almost reachable triumph. celebrate A road is not only filled with roses. After one practice, I asked Mr. Revas for permission to have a day off because I needed to go to San Francisco to take the Toefl test. He accepted and wished me luck. Due to the long distance from my school, which is in the area of Santa Cruz, and the testing hour, I had to wake up at five'o clock in the morning.

After travelling for one and half hour, I arrived at the test center just to realize that I did not bring my passport. The test center's officer did not let me take the test unless I could provide legitimate identification. I lost the money, which I believe around $140, and time. My aunt drove me back to school, telling me try to be more careful next time. Another one and half hour was spent, and I saw my school's gate. I hated myself for wasting my aunt's time and my parent's money. Indeed, I did not know what to do. When school was over, I headed to the soccer field. Coach was surprised when he saw me, but he did not ask why I was here.

During the practice, I could not focus on the ball. I made my teammates frustrated whenever the ball came to me. Consequently, a maladroit player like me at that time contributed comprehensively to the failure of the whole team during the scrimmage. This did not escape from coach's observation, and unfortunately, when the practice was done, he told me to join the JV team the following week. I felt like the sky was falling on me, the earth was cracking, and the biggest loser on earth who did not even deserve the smallest sentence of merit from any of his peers. I asked hopelessly in my head, "What should I do now?" I told what had happened to my with my close friends afterward.

They commiserated with me, and my pain was mollified, though not comprehensively. I barely smiled after a week or so. However, God always has a plan for all of us; perhaps, the worst thing is paradoxically the requisite for the best thing that is yet to come. The first day with the JV team had changed my opinion about soccer, and different perspectives in life. As Mr. Revis introduced a new member from the Varsity team to the JV's players, they looked at me with admiration and excitement. This JV team was different from that of the previous year, primarily consisting of freshman. They voted me to become the captain, the position that I had never dreamt of. In soccer, the strength and unity of a team can be revealed easily through the captain's role. I was not an excellent player, but I knew I could play. Nevertheless, knowing how to play was far from being able to lead the team successfully.

I asked my coach, “Do you think I have the capacity to do so?" "I will help you,” he said briefly. Reluctantly, I had become a captain. Throughout the time I had with my new team, I discovered an undiscovered joy from soccer that I had never experienced before the taste of happiness and comfort. The upper division might be more talented and skillful, but everyone in JV played with joy. In this less environment, I was able to see the sky wider, the field greener, and the ball clearer. Nevertheless, I even committed myself more during practices and after it ended, because I needed to be an exemplary captain.

Since the number of players in the JV team was smaller than that of the Varsity, I got trained individually more by coach. Thanks to him, my soccer's ability improved and thus gradually qualified me to the position that I had. I improved, so did the team. When the league began, I was able to play the whole match. We did not win much, but we did not let the opponent team scored as many as they wanted. We lost to the most redoubtable opponent, Pajaro Valley High School, by only two goals. It was quite a success for us because they had beaten my previous JV team 10-0 last year.

At the final game against Sea Side High School, Mr. Revas decided to have a small ceremony for all of the seniors in the soccer team. Varsity won 2-1, but JV celebrated the night with an unbelievable victory, 7-0. I got the Mustang Award from Mr. Revas, and he thanked me for setting up a new standard for the JV team itself.

That glorious picture is still vivid in my mind now, as if that day was just yesterday. While sharing these memories, I find connections with these great authors, Andrew Lam and Chitra Divakaruni. In his short story, "The Child of Two Worlds," which is an honest confession of the author himself about his challenging time living through both countries, Vietnam and America, Lam writes, "Life is a sea of suffering, and sorrow gives meaning to life.” Lam is right! Those sorrowful moments may discourage a person to live on happily; nevertheless, because of those tough times, we find ourselves stronger in every situation.

We then will live this life more confidently, more meaningfully, and, consequently, more optimistically. In "Clothes," a short story depicting the difficult time that Sumita, an Indian girl, has to overcome when she decides to follow her husband, Somesh, to live in the United States, Divakaruni states, “Besides, wasn't it every woman's destiny, as Mother was always telling me, to leave the known for the unknown" (58). I find this message not only true for women themselves, but for us, men, as well. Sometimes, we also have to leave "the known for the unknown."

Moving from Varsity group, which consisted of the great number of familiar faces that I knew, to JV, which had all the new people, was a spine challenge for me. Yet, sometimes, I still wonder, could the fruits in that known land be as bountiful and as rich as those that on the unknown land? The joy and practical results that I have accrued in the JV team make me confidently say "yes." I was kicked out from Varsity to become an irreplaceable part in JV—the captain. Life is a mystery. Coincidence and order of things are something that we merely cannot control nor predict.

The first option may or may not be the optimal one, because we still have the second, the third, and the list goes on. Through my personal story, I have learned that we need to be optimistic to motivate ourselves move forward, and failure is but another valuable lesson for us to sharpen our identities. If this story had not happened, I think I am still an insular person who sees an object with only its front. Well, the story has happened, and it contributes greatly to my identity, and what kind of person I am today. I am the one who can stand up from failure, and never admit something that is considered "best," because we will never know what is really the best for us.