The Need Of People to Belong

Social media: the perceived peak of connectivity of humanity throughout the world in this day in age. This development of technological innovation has achieved has led to new societal values and set the foundation for the next century, and perhaps the cornerstone for the future of society. With that in mind, the connectivity of our generation has brought a new societal age of the human necessity to belong. Each individual in society must be accepted in order for them to feel comfortable enough to behave properly whilst becoming united, even if certain people stand out from the crowd.

Humans have the need to belong since they are afraid of being alone, and without the necessity being fulfilled, they’d react in many different manners, including horrible ones. There are and were always snowflakes in society, however their isolation became their downfall. To exemplify, history portrayed this: when religions began fighting over control of humanity’s values, anyone who felt comfortable enough to live on their own without belonging to a religious group was slaughtered.

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After a couple of thousands of years had gone by, this process may have eventually annihilated all the humans who had the will to not obey, and thus those of us who are alive today are clearly not the descendants of these long-extinct, purely free-thinking people. Although, the remnants of some people with these certain characteristics in modern society could generally be categorized into two similar but particularly different titles: outliers and outsiders. Outliers are those who, within a certain social group, differ from the rest of the herd.

This could be from a variety of subjects: background, belief, culture, etc. On the other hand, outsiders are those who simply do not belong within a social group. Although there are people who defy social norms in a large or small scale, universally, we need to belong.

First off, in addition to the points made in the introduction, humans are social creatures. They require other humans to create a community — a family, per say — as to function properly. It could be stated that when humans are united towards one objective, success is all but certain. The proverb “united together, divided we fall” truly shows this concept, in addition to Metamorphosis, which shows the Samsa family progressing through uncharted territory after they were forced to live with the fact that Gregor could no longer “provide… ...for his parents and his sister”. The remaining able members of the family had to step up to the mantle of baring responsibility for the money-making. In relation to the proverb, the divisions created due to the social isolation and miscommunication of Gregor as an outsider towards both his coworkers and family formed false, premature assumptions and consequences, which were put into effect after he transformed into a cockroach, though he was already portrayed as a cockroach beforehand. His poor communication and connection with his community doomed him to fail. To tie it up, humans are social creatures who build communities to add a sense of belonging and unity, and those who isolate themselves out of their community entirely will turn into a Gregor.

Secondly, social conformity is the key to survival. We are born into an established group - immediate caretakers, family, ethnic group, nation... No infant would survive without being a part of a group. Not many adults could make it in the world without eating food others grew, living in houses others built, using tools others thought into existence. Being a part of a group gives us a sense of safety. Yet all of us disagree with at least some of social norms. Would we fund a war with people on another continent whom we never met if we had a choice? Would we deny health care to a baby or an elderly if it was up to us? Would we agree to build nuclear plants, coal mines, concentration camps? We realize swinging to far right or left might result in much more than strange looks from the others, we might end up in jail. Social conformity is a balancing act and without some of us taking a stand and going against established norms we'd still have slavery, a woman still would be man's property in most societies, we'd have kings and inquisition, we'd still think we are living on a flat Earth. Being a part of a group is a constance exercise in confronting our boundaries, our "code of conduct", it's a constant lesson on the subject of knowing one's values and beliefs, of finding one's place in the world, of knowing who am I.