Same Sex Marriage

"Marriage is a coming together for better or for worse, hopefully enduring, and intimate to the degree of being sacred. It is an association that promotes a way of life, not causes; a harmony in living, not political faiths; a bilateral loyalty, not commercial or social projects. ” (U. S. Supreme Court). Marriage has been defined as a religious & legal commitment between a man and woman, as well as an expression of love. Homosexuals have not been allowed to partake in these commitments and the rising support for same sex marriage is becoming more of an issue for the government and voters.

There are those that are against same sex marriage, who believe that marriage should be strictly between a man and a woman (Barber), and then there are those who believe that it is up to the individual on whom they want to marry (Quindlen). Despite the complexities surrounding the issue of gay marriage and the expansive argument on either side authors Anna Quindlen and La Shawn Barber present extremely simplistic yet opposing views on same sex marriage.

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Anna Quindlen and La Shawn Barber both believe that the overall structure that comes from a marriage is extremely important.

They both agree that marriage promotes the common good by building families and raising children. Children are a major issue and both want what is best for them but who’s to say what is best for them. Barber beliefs surround the idea that homosexual parents would be incapable of raising a child and that by having two parents of the same sex will not allow the child to have the “proper” adult figures in their life such as have a father or a mother.

Quindlen argues that by not allowing homosexuals to get married they cannot adopt children therefore those children cant receive any type of parental figures.

They both also believe that the physical structure of society is extremely important and each side believes that marriage is major contributing factor towards it. This common ground between the two is the center to many of the arguments that each side has revealing the issues that present more specific yet simplistic view points. The vote on Gay marriage has fluctuated from time to time and although it continues to not be legalized Quindlen says that it is inevitable and that down the road gay marriage will be accepted.

Many people that are for Gay marriage believe that by not allowing gay marriage it is denying them their right to religious freedom As explained by Quindlen, Mormon groups helped pay millions of dollars towards anti gay marriage campaigns in order to disallow same sex marriage. Quindlen uses this to show us that many groups have no other justifiable cause to disallow same sex marriage other than to up hold their own faith in their own religion. This however takes into no account of how gay couples feel about their own religious beliefs and interpretations. Another main issue that is presented is the issue of it being a civil right.

Supporters of gay marriage see marriage as a civil right and believe that even if it is a marriage between two men or two women it should be recognized at least as civil union or marriage that is backed by the government. Some states have considered this new form of commitment called a "civil union", which essentially is marriage without using the word "marriage". But even the many same sex couples believe this is wrong. States such as “New York and New Jersey could pass a measure guaranteeing matrimony to all” but until they do these civil unions, in the few states that accept them, is all gay couples have to rely on.

Many politicians have said they are against gay marriage but think it should be left up to the states to decide. Gay marriage supporters and Quindlen know that homosexuality is considered a minority and that the rights of minorities should be protected. This is the main reason we have a Bill of Rights as well as anti-slavery and equal protection amendments. Quindlen believes that denying marriage to a homosexual couple is no different than denying marriage to black couples. “I was raised by two homosexuals. I was surrounded by homosexuals… but they did not influence me” (quote in article) this is the argument that many homosexuals make.

Homosexuality to them is not a life choice that they can just choose to be they see being gay as what is biologically encoded into their brains. By making this case this becomes more about civil rights because now it can be interperated as being in the same category as being a certain race. Being the minority, Quindlen also argues that people are opposed of the idea of gay marriage because it is not what a traditional marriage is seen as. When we think of a marriage we think of the “traditional” wedding flowers, dresses, bridesmaids, rings, tuxedos, and grooms men.

Supporters against same sex marriage only see this traditional marriage between a man and a woman. This aspect is what many supporters focus on. The legitimacy of a marriage is lost when it becomes between two individuals that are of the same sex. Supporters against same sex marriage believe that it threatens the structure of society along with the institution of marriage itself. This will intern effect children and will cause a more negative effect on society. La Shawn Barber also stresses the effects of gay marriage on other types of marriages.

This is the slippery slope effect that many people worry about. Barber believes that if we allow gay marriage what is stopping people from having marriages with close relatives or even multiple marriages. What if adults wanted to marry children? Barber ties these into her argument against gay marriage to portray the possibilities of these types of marriages happening next. In the Supreme Court case Loving v. Virginia a white man is married to a black woman and they are charged with a felony based solely on the fact that they were different races.

Later on through court proceedings it is ruled a civil right to be able to have interracial marriages. Berber therefore argues that the race of a person and their sexual orientation are completely different. This than makes the issue of gay marriage only being a life choice. Being a life choice Barber believes that homosexuality should not be protected, being a member of a certain race is in avoidable but because Barber believes that it is a life choice such as the court case and not something that is biological therefore the government should not protect it under the civil rights amendment.

The simplistic views on same sex marriage from Anna Quindlen and La Shawn Barber show us that they believe in the importance of marriage. Their opposing ideals reveal how they believe marriage effects our society and the children we raise in it. The controversy over same sex marriage will continue to be a big issue in today’s world and maybe some day it will be resolved.