We can never really escape or distance ourselves from the influence of our parent’s in our lives because there engraved in our subconscious, traits, and personality. Their accustom, beliefs, morals, and values is what they use to try to develop us as individuals. They mold us to either inherit or shift the way we view our future. A linage cycle that can be inherited by past upbringings or fuel the very desire to overthrow it. Escaping it is inevitable it will creep back in ways of memories, conversation, and physically.
I believe it’s desirable for those who aren’t capable to deal with the realism of their reality. Those who lost hope of understanding the underlying reason why and want to avoided it. For example, in the tone of the author I sense bitterness, confliction, resentment towards the mother, but overall no love lost. She stated that “she talked to her mother on the phone three years before her death and her mother didn’t give an ounce of joy about her accomplishment.
I can relate to this moment with my mother not understanding the depths of my achievements despite setbacks and brushing them off as if there insignificant. Growing up was difficult to connect to my parents. Quite often I felt like a black sheep tending to my younger siblings. Every dreams and goals I wanted to achieved were quickly dismissed as if its nothing more than a fairy tale based on what their beliefs in what success is.
Their very words shattered the searching of my identity and disappointed the ideals of what they expected. The connection is broken just as she spoke of the description “she would rather be dead than spend eternity with their mother.” These tragic events could sway the protagonist to not want children or even be resentful to a point that cycle repeats itself.
Yet, confliction that her mother wasn’t always his horrifying beast. Excerpt: “When we were children and in need of a mother’s love and care, there was no better mother to provide such an ideal entity.” Or “When the youngest of the three boy’s got sick with aids their mother would tend to him with the greatest tenderness that was absent before he was dying.” Despite the shocking perspective and words of the others who attended her mother’s funeral which contradict to whom they know. Ultimately, the resolution was showcase a great loved missed in her childhood to her children and to use her upbringings of not being accepted from the very role model she had to close a chapter that’s still unresolved.