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Love is a beautiful phenomenon as individuals see the beauty in one another and develop feelings of affection. However, those who has been in love often wish that love was as perfect as love itself, for they’ve learnt that such strong feelings of affection often creates obsession rather than love. One may have such strong feelings towards their beloved that they may also believe that they cannot live without them, but the lover doesn’t truly love their beloved. Instead they are obsessed with their beloved.
Through different sources, I realized that society often mistake obsession for love.
In the song “I Need U”, the band BTS sings of a male lover who is obsessed with their toxic female beloved, who is “beautiful” yet “so cold”, for “because of [her], [the lover] [is] becoming ruined” (BTS). She “pierces [him]”, and yet, the lover “keeps needing [the girl] when [he] knows [he’ll] get hurt” (BTS). The lover realizes that the relationship severely lacked love for he was “in love alone” and was “hurting alone” (BTS).
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It was a vicious cycle, where the lover desperately tried to save the relationship when the female caused nothing but pain. They were like a game of seesaw, where the lover begged of his beloved to stay so that game will continue to work, but the female had already parted from the relationship much sooner than the lover. He loved her too much to let her go, and unconsciously, that love turned to an obsession, thus leaving the lover alone on the seesaw, with no way of continuing that game.
He couldn’t find the courage to break off the relationship as he believed he needed her to find happiness; he needed her to live. The relationship portrayed in this song is a great example of ones found in real life. Numerous relationships fail due to the confusion between obsession and love. Society often rushes love, and jumps into a relationship before they can truly understand their feelings. They confuse love with their hunger for affection, and then they become terribly afraid to end a relationship due to loneliness and the lack of closeness with another.
However, there is a reason behind such obsession. In the nonfiction, Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love, by Helen Fisher, chemicals in our brain such as dopamine and serotonin play a huge role in love. Fisher states that dopamine, when increased, will produce “extremely focused attention” (4). On the other hand, decreased levels of serotonin causes our “racing thoughts” where we “never stop thinking about [our beloved]” (14). Once we’re in love, we tend to direct all of our focus onto our beloved, and slowly, that unwavering focus on our beloved slowly leads into that obsession. When we are in love, we often find ourselves thinking about our beloved so much that, ultimately, it occupies every single one of our thoughts. That will result in an obsessive thinking of our. Although I have not been in love, I understand how a certain someone or something can occupy my thoughts so effectively where I cannot focus on anything else. That obsessive thinking has prevented me from living my life for my life has become that person or that something.
After examining the two sources, I now understand that society often mistake their burning passion for someone as love, and most of the time, that will only result in heartbreak. I believe that society can prevent such heartbreaks by taking the time to interpret their feelings rather then hastily rushing into a relationship. It is a challenge to differentiate between love and obsession, as the intensity of our feelings blinds us from understanding well, but as long as both parties make an effort to mend and better their relationship, true love can truly exist between individuals.
Short Essay on Love and Obsession Described in Different Sources. (2024, Feb 16). Retrieved from https://studymoose.com/short-essay-on-love-and-obsession-described-in-different-sources-essay
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