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It can be a very hard topic to discuss, and even harder to obtain. There is a lot of talks nowadays about the idea; there are love song, love letters, and websites that claim that they will help you find “the one”. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines love as a strong affection for another arising out of kindship or personal ties. There are various factors that contribute to the compatibility of two people: family values, religion, morals, ethics, and the overall personal interests of one another.
It seems that in the traditional view of love marriage is heavily associated with the unity and happiness of a couple.
On the other hand, in the more modern view of love happiness and sexual gratification can be achieved without needing to be committed. The in bible passage “1 Corinthians 13” written by St. Paul, one of the apostles, he promotes a message of unity that focuses on the idea of love. He discusses love as being very much influenced by religious values.
In the passage, he starts with “If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal” (St.
Paul) Although, unclear at first the quote can be broken apart to better understand it. The phrase “speak with the tongues of men and of angels” (St. Paul) is referring to the ability to speak and comminute effective with anyone and everyone. However, Paul goes on to say “but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal” (St. Paul).
This text “lies in knowing that within the biblical tradition, the cymbal was never played alone, but always accompanied other instruments, singing, and words of praise.” (Portier-Young) As well as, being considered as a “rhythmic expression… that make a joyful noise” (Portier-Young). St. Paul knows that being accompanied by a loved one or even being apart of a community is better than being isolated because it provides a sense of joy and euphoria. Aiding in this idea the author claims “If I have the gift of prophecy and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing” (St. Paul). An analysis of this could be interpreted as meaning; even if one has all powers, all intelligence, all wealth, and everything one could want it all means nothing if one does not have love. In the passage, love is discussed as being true, pure, and everlasting. With the understanding of the Catholic faith, one can further interpret this piece. In Catholicism matrimony is sacred; after the holy union of two people, it is against faith to break vows. It is discussed that “love suffers long and is kind” (St. Paul).
Marriage in traditional culture is “until death does us part” couples go through many challenges in life, but with the help of faith, the marriage and love will continue. The text states that “love does not envy” (St. Paul) if a couple truly loves one another they will be happy for the success of their partner rather than envy his/her accomplishments. The passage also claims that “love does not parade itself, is not puffed up, does not behave rudely” (St. Paul). True love is not fake and does not need to be proved; bystanders can tell the happiness of a relationship by merely viewing the couple. Individuals who are in love are never rude, and show love towards one another whenever a chance presents itself. This text touches heavily upon enduring love. Many marriages in the current society are torn apart by differences, whether it is money, family ideals, or personal opinions. This eventually leads to an overall unhappiness for both parties. The passage states that love “bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, [and] endures all things” (St. Paul) and that “love never fails” (St. Paul) “develops the permanence of love in contrast to the charisms, and finally asserts love’s superiority even over the other theological virtues” (USCCB).
The overall idea that St. Paul is trying to say is that “love mandates that all utterances be interpreted for the community, so that the gift of tongues will no longer divide God’s church, but will instead contribute to its unity in Christ.” (Portier-Young) Again, emphasizing on the religious values in the concept of love and marriage. In the poem “To My Dear and Loving Husband” written by Anne Bradstreet, the concept of marriage and everlasting love is the main focus. Even the title suggests a holy and happy matrimony. In traditional love, the concept of marriage was used as a way of showing devotion to another individual. The poem starts out with the phrase “If ever two were one, then surely we.” (Bradstreet) Referring to Bradstreet’s romantic union with her husband and claims that they were always meant to be together. She also states “I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold” (Bradstreet) “Or all the riches that the East doth hold.” (Bradstreet)
“Gold is only valuable in human society…. Bradstreet may capitalize “Mines” simply to emphasize vast wealth.” (Ruby) Bradstreet states that she rather have the love of her husband over any wealth; the love she receives from her husband is priceless. Analyzing this text one would discover that “East doth” refers to a location in Asia where there was said to be unimaginable wealth and bounty (Google). Bradstreet goes on to say “my love is such that rivers cannot quench” (Bradstreet). “Shifting from how much she values this earthly love, the speaker expresses the scope and insatiability of her desire.” (Ruby) As well as, stating that her love can never be taken away. Later on, she states “Nor ought but love from thee, give recompense.” (Bradstreet) Bradstreet is suggesting that all marriages have issues and in order to maintain the relationship, one needs to make amends to their partner for an wrongdoing. She goes on to say “thy love is such I can no way repay” (Bradstreet) in this text Bradstreet is praising her husband for being the wonderful man that he is. She claims that she can never repay him for the love he gives her, but in turn will try to. By saying “the heavens reward thee manifold, I pray” (Bradstreet) she is doing just that.
Somewhat going off of the theory “what goes around comes around” she hopes that God will reward her husband for his good dead. Again, including the religious connotation to love and marriage. Towards the end of the piece, she says “then while we live, in love let’s so persevere” (Bradstreet) Bradstreet want to persevere the “honeymoon phase” that she and her husband are in for the rest of their lives. She hopes that they will always be this happy together. At the end of this poem, it is clear that Bradstreet is truly and utterly in love with her husband. There is no doubt that a happy and holy marriage can be possible as long as both partners appreciate one another, and equal effort goes into the matrimony.
In contrast, to traditional love, modern love does not rely as much on marriage and the concepts of soulmates. In the poem “True Love” written by Wislawa Szymborska she discusses the absurdity of the theory of true love. The poem starts with “Ture love. Is it normal Is it serious, is it practical? What does the world get from two people who exist in a world of their own?” (Szymborska) Szymborska is making fun of the people that believe that true love is real. She considers it to be completely unnecessary and benefits no one other than the people involved. Later on, she continues with stating that there is “no good reason” (Szymborska) and claiming that the couple believes that “it had to happen this way” (Szymborska). In other words, the idea of true love or soulmates is completely unrealistic. “We cannot choose whom we love, nor predict when the feelings will occur, and we usually cannot recapture the feeling when it has disappeared. That we use the expression falling in love suggests how precipitately the event can occur.” (Granebaum) Many people believe that “romantic/erotic love is a powerful force in the lives of ordinary men and women one” (Grunebaum)
The text continues to mock the couple in love by stating “look at the happy couple. Couldn’t they at least try to hide it, fake a little depression for their friends’ sake? Listen to them laughing – it’s an insult. The language they use – deceptively clear. And their little celebrations, rituals, the elaborate mutual routines – it’s obviously a plot behind the human race’s back!”(Szymborska) Szymborska is hinting at the annoyance that the couple sets on the witnessing bystanders. Everyone knows that couple that is always showing each other off and displaying public affection. For the people that do not have a partner or are struggling to find love observing the happy couple perhaps will make them feel upset and even uncomfortable. The poem claims that true love “comes along so rarely” (Szymborska) that they should “let the people who never find true love keep saying that there’s no such thing. Their faith will make it easier for them to live and die.'(Szymborska) If someone believes that true love is not real they will never feel the need to obtain it, as well as, never worrying about meeting “the one”. Many people do not believe in soulmates, and go on and live completely happy lives.
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