The Personal Analytical Paper Essay
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Often times, I find myself sitting alone, reading a book or enjoying a cup of coffee. Sometimes I could sit for hours in a coffee shop just by myself. I contemplate on the things that are going on in my life. I think of the issues and problems that are bothering me. I try to sort out the many things that trouble me.
I cannot help but question myself, why do I prefer to keep my problems to myself? Why do I choose not to open up to other people? My best friend has asked me this question several times.
Why can’t I let others in?
As I try to figure out the answer to my question, I begin to analyze the other facets of myself. Am I anti-social? Am I a loner? Can I not mingle with other people? If I answer yes to any of these questions then I need not explore any further for they would explain why I prefer to keep things to myself. However, I cannot say that I am completely anti-social. I cannot say that I am a loner nor can I say that I do not mingle with other s for I do. I go out; I socialize and have fun but when it comes to personal matters, particularly personal struggles and problems, I tend not to open up to anyone.
Other people would call their closest friends at times of trouble. Others would seek help or simply look for a comforting shoulder or an ear willing to listen. I myself have friends who would call me and tell me their issues no matter how big or small. They would open up about the simplest problems to the most complicated ones. I listen and offer my shoulder so why do I not seek out the same things when I have the same problems? It is not that I do not have anyone to turn to for I believe I have sincere and true friends around. It is not that I think my friends would not understand for I know that they are more than capable of helping me analyze the situation.
So why can’t I open up to them? Why do I prefer to sit with a book or a cup of coffee to sort out my problems? As I figure out the answers to these questions over a cup of dark roast coffee, as I usually do, I realize that it is just my nature to handle things on my own.
Since I was young, my parents have raised me to become independent. They tried to instill in me the value of knowing what I can do and doing it. They taught me that if I can do something on my own then I should just do it on my own. As I look back on my past, I realized that even though help has been offered so many times in so many different situations I have always preferred to do things on my own.
I realized that my coffee shop sessions were merely my planning and organizing phase. It is at these times when I try to figure out if there’s anything I can do to resolve the problems I face. The coffee sessions alone are my version of private space. As I look around in the coffee shop I feel connected to the world yet at the same time I feel that I have my own space and time.
Having coffee alone, in my case, is not a sign of being a loner. Rather it is a sign of every individual belonging to the same world yet at the same time having his own little world to explore and contemplate on.