The Impact of Internet Use on Human Relationships

The number of internet users is growing more and more with time, increasing at the speed of light every single minute. In fact, according to the majority of people, the whole Internet may be very well seen and considered as a part of high technology that simplified and improved our lives. But, even though the internet can be unanimously considered as one of the greatest developments in the entire human history, I strongly believe that it is, in fact, making us more lonely and depressed.

In a simple definition, loneliness is considered to be a state of some sort of disconnection. So, apparently, the Internet should actually help, right? Well, one of the Internet’s so-called benefits and advantages is the fact that it connects and helps people all over the world to maintain their relationships, since a lot of people tend to drift apart and proceed with their lives. Still, there is nothing that can actually take the place of the face-to-face interaction and communication that, in this case, is lost.

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I do not think that staying on your couch or even your dark room chatting all day long is the same as going out for a long walk or drinking a cup of tea with one of your actual friends.

Trying to behave as a “social-network-online” person is in fact turning us into some “social offline” persons. The Internet is coming up with a lot of new ways of virtual communications and social contacts facilities every single day. This may seem very compelling, but, in my opinion, that is exactly what is causing this social isolation.

Since, we are being connected as ever before why are these people feeling even lonelier? You can send a lot of e- mails, Facebook messages, SMSes without a guarantee that those people will even reply.

Sharing everything about our lives through different photos and videos on the Internet is nothing but a contribution to the growing sense of loneliness. The user logs into a social media page such as Facebook or Instagram, being directly faced with pictures showing people or friends being part of activities such as partying, traveling, and even organizing gatherings you are not even invited.

The Internet is truly providing us with all kinds of opportunities; but however, it is making us feel as a part of a machine, in one way or another. People get caught up in chat rooms around-the-clock, mostly acting like someone that they are not, leading to some serious mental health issues caused from the Internet, whether it is “Internet addiction disorder”, low self esteem and even social phobia. More and more Internet users, especially the social media ones, tend to mentally craft a desired image of themselves they want everyone in the world to see. Because of the infinite range of the opportunities that the Internet has to offer, a lot of people choose to only share the good things about them and their lives, consequently receiving a lot of good comments in their notifications. In my opinion, this is the cause of a cycle where many users and their friends automatically post only the best and greatest things happening to them in order to keep up with the others.

This crafting of this desired image leads to another cycle that I like to call “a- crack-in-relationships cycle” since the lack of openness bring us to a not completely “formed” relationship, caused by a person trying to keep up his exterior walls as a facade to prevent people from really getting to know each other. All of these cycles contribute to the feeling of loneliness and disconnection these people get, thinking that no one truly knows or understand them. Tending to compare what the others post in their social-medias to our behind-the-scenes selves can also give us that feeling of loneliness, too.

A lot of people cannot understand how being able to communicate and chat with anyone you want can make someone feel lonely. Well, I believe that the fact that people get used to standing behind a computer screen, confined in their homes, makes them to lose the ability to actually socialize and really know other persons, leading to a feeling of loneliness and awkwardness while being surrounded by other people, or standing in a crowd. While chatting, people tend to participate in conversations that seem like low risk ones or controllable, making the user lazier emotionally and more neglecting. This leads to “conversations in demand”, a term referred to someone’s who can switch or log off whenever a conversation seems too boring, awkward or difficult to continue.

Many people may debate and claim that this is what they love about chatting and being part of social medias, and that there is nothing wrong with that, but in my opinion, is exactly this emotional risk that someone takes to be himself, honest, and even vulnerable that helps to create real and pure connections with the others. Logging and switching off, or even avoiding those kinds of conversations creates a feeling of loneliness, while stealing from us the chance to create a real bond and relation with another person. I think that there is no risk in liking someone’s Facebook or Instagram photo or leaving a good comment in it, but expressing your real opinion and compliment in person, while maybe having a feeling of envy, is much more difficult. The thought of keeping a safer and even easier Internet-level interaction and communication, leaves the awful taste of loneliness in us. Settling for an illusion, instead of actually making an effort in getting to know someone is also much easier.

To conclude, I think that it requires all kinds of connections to really create a real sense of some kind of relationship. The Internet usage can help to add a channel, it can be a part of that entire “mosaic” of connections; but it should not be the most important and the primary one to create those social bonds.