First of all, I wish to laud you for having tackled these important aspects of the problem you wish to do research on:
- You have an excellent grasp of long-term outcomes, policy changes (p. 7)
- Acknowledging that some baseline research has already been done (p. 5)
- Difficulties (p. 6), really Limitations which you must address by recommending suitable methodology
- Research objectives (p. 6)
May I suggest you restructure in this fashion?
- One paragraph on “why should we be concerned about child abuse?”
- One long paragraph on historical prevalence (cite authoritative sources, including those that have parallels to the domestic/family/society practices in KSA).
- One (long) paragraph on the moral and policy framework espoused by international organizations (e.g. UNICEF?)
- The child abuse prevalence, social philosophy and policy framework in selected countries (It is good to cite the U.S. but are there others? Notably Muslim ones?)
- Please consider moving the sentence at the bottom of page 3 here. It’s an effective recap.
- REVIEW OF LITERATURE
You have ten references lined up in the bibliography. Why not do justice to your research by summarizing what you’ve found in them? Perhaps in this sequence?
- Prevalence of child abuse in KSA and other Muslim societies
- Types of child abuse committed in KSA
- Why it may be under-reported. (This is where the current content of “Difficulties of the study” really belongs. Cite sources.)
- The social factors behind child abuse
- Social, religious and policy support for combating child abuse in KSA. What legal support is there for intervening in domestic cases of child abuse, for treating both abuser and victim? In any society, physicians would be hamstrung if laws did not exist to mandate reporting of abuse and penalties for offenders. Everybody would just sweep things under the rug.
- How victims are aided/helped and offenders treated
- What information gaps still exist?
IMPORTANCE OF THE STUDY
Then you’d bring in the pioneering role of KFSH&RC here to affirm that some organization is doing something about child abuse but (point G. above) there remain information gaps that must be addressed if effective remedial measures are to be proposed.
RESEARCH PROPOSAL PROPER
- Research Objectives
Revise, expand or tone down according to what you have already found in Review of Literature above.
4th bullet point: replace “volume” with “incidence” or “prevalence”
5th and 6th bullet points: move to “OUTCOMES” below
Consider taking out the 7th point, this involves you in doing longitudinal studies.
Last bullet point: please consider re-writing to make it more specific or measurable, e.g., “Formulating – via professional consensus – a structured process for resolution, therapy and general management of abuse patients and offenders….”
- Type of Study
Considering the ticklish social situation you speak about, please think about augmenting your methodology with qualitative methods, e.g., focus groups, depth interviews and projective techniques.
- Target Respondents
The seven points you made at the top of page 6 work better here to help shape your considerations (or rationale) for tackling different types of respondents and the data-gathering approach suitable for each one.
Consider adding educators to your sample. Not all child abuse cases result in physical trauma and not all traumas are reported to pediatricians either. Do you have something like social welfare workers in KSA? They might be a good source, too.
- Study Instruments
Under Questionnaire, “This questionnaire consists of several parts” I think what you really mean is that you plan to create different versions depending on whether you’re interviewing physicians, parents, abused children or adults who can tell you about having been maltreated as children. I believe you want to tread carefully about promising to interview abused children, this is one of the most challenging “discovery/disclosure” type of sessions counselors have to undertake.
This is where your statements on pages 6 and 7 belong.
Your situation strikes me as one of advocacy, i.e., you want to provide a firmer basis for recognizing the problem, for professionals to take action and for government to provide legislative support. You might also co-opt Sharia, if Koranic law has anything to say about child abuse.
A FINAL NOTE: I’m not sure what “missing paragraphs” you allude to, that’s why I sent the earlier message. The way we work, in any case, supplemental writing would be covered by filing a second order of the “Edit” type. This is a “Review” order.
Good luck. Hope all the above have helped.