Sibling Abuse Leads to Consequences

Sibling abuse can change a child’s life within that day. This personal story has a long lasting effect on this one little girl who had belligerence through her whole life. “ I was maybe two or three, when the first incident happened. I remember it clearly, the scene, my brother and I taking a bath together. He asked, many a time, “Can I touch yours, if you touch mine?” I was so young, so naive, how could I have known to say no? I could feel deep down in my bones, that it was wrong, but I wasn’t sure how.

I thought I could trust my brother, just two years older. Throughout my childhood, he would constantly ask to play the “pantsing game,” which consisted of the two of us trying to see who could pull the other’s pants down first; he always seemed to win. Yet again, I just didn’t understand how wrong this could be, until, one time, I noticed a bulge.

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I remember asking him, “what’s that?” and he responded, “nothing.” I felt weird after that, like I knew that picture wasn’t right. At some point I confronted him about the incident. I was still young, confident enough to call him out, but naive enough to not know for what.

I asked him what his friends would think of him, if they knew he played this game with me. And that seemed to stop the games, for the time being. I was the loser who faded into the shadows more and more everyday.

How could someone so evil to me, be known to everyone as Mr. Perfect? It still screws me up, knowing that he got the upper-hand, even when he ruined the innocence of a child, and so much more.” (“Personal Story of Sexual Abuse”). Some behavior problems of seeing that a child is being sexualy abused, or any other type of abuse is like verbal, physical, and relational. A lot of sibling abuse leads to long term consequences like sexualy hurased, or just being abused in any kind of way. “Survivors of sexual abuse may feel like they were to blame, or they may convince themselves they were a co-conspirator, rather than a victim...Sometimes survivors experience sexual dysfunction mental health problems, or PTSD as a result of the abuse as well...

Adult survivors sometimes experience on going relationship problems as a result.” (“Facts about Sexual Abuse”) Sibling abuse is hard to watch out for but most abuse happens when the parents are not around. Some signs for parents to look for are emotional, sexual, or even physical abuse. The parents can also tell if there is sibling abuse when one child is always the victim and the other is always the aggressor in the situations. If the situations get to the point that one of them is avoiding the other than there is a problem between the siblings. Some situations come to a point that the victim starts having behavior problems, eating habits, and also any type of sleeping problems. Most parents do not see if there child is being abused because it just looks like they're playing, but if it comes to punching and kicking then that is sibling abuse. When the child has been abused they may get addicted to drugs or alcohol.

They just might even have depression, anxiety, or even low self-esteem. If the child gets addicted to drugs or alcohol then that is an impediment for that child to conquer, because that child has been hurt so many times that they do not know what to do any more. Some risk factors of sibling abuse is that the parents are not around as much, not involved with the child's life, the parents play favorites, the parents also compare the children from one another, plus many more. The ways of preventing sibling abuse is by taking care of your children better, or just to be more involved with their lives. Bullying is the number one top priority that leads to abusive situations. Being there for your child can help encourage them into standing up for themselves. Try to set up a time with your child to review and role play about what he/she can do in a bullying situation. If your child's friend is being an antagonist to your child then just take precaution that your child could be in danger.

List some ideas for your child to tell their friend like, “Ask to speak with your friend in a nice quiet place; in person and not on text or on phone. Its best to share your feelings without insulting your friend. If your friend can't see your viewpoint, you may need to disagree. However if your friend continues to hurt you then you need to put some distance between you and your friend and take a break in your friendship.” (Boyse “Bullying”). Sibling bully-victims is a real thing that can lead to major consequences. “About one third of all siblings report that they both bully their siblings and get bullied by their siblings...that means that about three out of five kids involved in sibling bullying are both the perpetrator and the victim of the bullying. While the older sibling is usually bigger, stronger, and more cognitively advanced, younger siblings can be highly provocative.” (Kennedy-Moore “Psychology Today”). Being there for your children makes them enamored in their lives. A lot of unexplainable accidents happen when the parents are not at home or they do not spend enough time around that child. Being there for your children can can help reduce stress between the family, school, or even with friends. Playing favorites with your children is a big no to trying to be there for each child.

“Teach your kids positive ways to get attention from each other. Show them how to approach another child and ask them to play, and to share their belongings and toys.” (Boyse “Sibling Rivalry”). Even just having some one on one time with each child can bring up their confidence at doing things. Spending alone time with your child helps improve the understanding that the parents want to be in there lives, but still to give them space. If the child starts talking about one of the other siblings is being aggressive towards them then just take a percaustion that it may be sibling abuse.”Educate yourself about the risk factors of sibling sexual abuse and take appropriate steps to prevent inappropriate sexual contact. If your suspect sexual abuse is going on in your home, it’s important to seek professional treatment for both the perpetrator and the victim.” (“Facts about Sexual Abuse”). Sibling abuse can be prevented if it is done correctly.

A lot of sexual abuse leads to long term consequences like sexualy haurased, or being abused in any other kind of way. Many people try to forget these incidents that happen, but most can not be forgotten. Being sexualy abused changes the victim from who they really are and most just hide it the darkness that never comes out. Hopefully, parents change the way that they treat their children so these incidents do not ever come close to happening. Even if it comes close that still has a chance that it can be put to an end. Sibling abuse is not a cool thing that happens to one another. It dramatically changes that person from who they really want to be like. Preventing sibling abuse can have many different ways to attack it from like taking them to a specialized safety service, or even just to talk to them yourself.