Portland Parks Essay
Oregonians can also help combat invasive plants in the Portland area by keeping an eye out for these noxious weeds and controlling them before they get established. Time is crucial when dealing with invasive plants and community members are encouraged to report sightings to a centralized, toll-free number set up by the Oregon Department of Agriculture. The number is 1-866-INVADER (OISC). This effort of early detection made by the state and local environmental authorities should be supported by the people of Portland, and it is as easy as making a call.
Another easy step for Portlanders to take is lending a hand to eradicate established invaders and reclaim our native landscapes. Volunteer work parties to remove invasive plants and restore native vegetation to natural areas are coordinated by different organizations, from Portland Parks and Recreation to Friends of Forest Park. These events are often held on the weekends; which make them easier for working Portlanders to participate in. “Individuals and groups are invited to help plant trees, monitor the health of newly planted trees, maintain natural area sites, help in the office and with fundraising activities” (OSCD).
These organizations also offer all the tools and training needed to participate in the work parties. If left unchecked, invasive plant species will continue to expand their coverage and further degrade water quality, fish and wildlife habitat, and the open space aesthetics within the City of Portland. As a citizen of Portland it is our responsibility to teach awareness about this problem so that our communities and ourselves can increase our efforts to preserve and protect the quality of open space habitat in parks and in our backyards. Blanca: Overall, this feels like a good beginning.
There was good use of statistics and sources without being overwhelming, although a few more examples and facts would have been good in the areas mentioned above to clear up some questions-in a few spots it felt like you just left it hanging to move on to the next idea. Your train of thought is easy to follow and your progression very good, making this paper easy to read and understand. You’re off to a good start! To answer your questions, repeating (in a concluding kind of way) the thesis statement you made at the beginning would add some power to your conclusion.
It felt like you just dropped a few of the ideas to hop over to teaching at the end, which you didn’t really talk about in your paper. Stick with the ideas about taking action you presented in the essay and the importance of that action on the future, as well as the consequences if it’s ignored, and possibly a statement on the results of actions that have already been taken, and you’ll be in good shape. Did that make sense? I like the idea of including the political situation and more information on the presented solutions, but for a brief summary this was a good start.
You’re definitely lacking in the rebuttals-probably because it’s hard to think of some on such an apparently one sided issue! You could expand that idea to present the problems with time, energy and social attitudes (“Someone else will do it eventually, so it’s not my problem”) that are going to stand in the way of their removal. That would round the paper out a little bit. If there are cases out there of other places where invasive plants have done major damage, that would also be good to include.
You could incorporate yourself if you wanted to, but I think the paper is stronger for sticking to general examples and how it’s impacting everyone, not just you. One of the biggest problems that is going to come up when it comes to actually doing these solutions is a lack of personal connection to the problem, and if you pull the focus away from everyone and onto yourself and how it’s affected you you might find yourself losing the people who were just barely interested in the first place.
Emphasizing that this is EVERYONE’S problem, and what’s going to happen if it continues to be ignored (you could be a little more specific about that-long term consequences, etc. ), will be a good way to strengthen this paper. I hope this helps! Comments: This is what I have so far…so bear with me. I’m a little nerve-wracked about this paper. I know my conclusion isn’t strong yet, so I’m working on that. I feel like it’s something that I need to work on last, once I feel comfortable with the rest of the paper. So right now that’s up in the air.
I’d like to know if it’s easy to recognize my audience? And what I can do to make that stronger. I tried to use words like us and our to build a bridge to my audience. Would this essay benefit from personal examples? My backyard…when I learned about invasive plants… etc? I definitely have not developed the proposed solutions enough. They are planting native plants, reporting invasive species, and removal/eradication of invasives. I think I also want to add a suggestion of contacting local politicians to ask that something be done.
I also have not addressed some of the rebuttals that Samm sent me: I do enough already I don’t have the time energy I’m working to integrate those into the paper. I really do appreciate a lengthy response to this essay. Peer responses are very helpful for me to develop my essay and I NEED to get a good grade on this paper. Comments on language that will draw in my audience and comments on structure will be especially beneficial. Where do you think I need more/if any citation? Thanks! Blanca
University/College: University of Arkansas System
Type of paper: Thesis/Dissertation Chapter
Date: 14 October 2016
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