One Night Stands and Regret
One Night Stands and Regret
Sex is considered a taboo up until we become college students. We have people whom want to remain chaste until marriage, we have people whom want to have experimental encounters with as many people as they can in college, and then there are people whom would only consider having sexual relations with their significant other. College parties are wild and it is guaranteed that at least 5 couples will end up hooking up at the end of the night. Most hook ups becomes one-night stands. If we were to ask those individuals if they regret their past encounters many would say yes because drugs or alcohol were involved. Drugs and and alcohol play an important role in sex. It is more likely for an intoxicated person to engage in sexual encounters than a sober person.
In the magazine Psychology Today, there is an article called “If I Could do it All Over Again” that talks about the half-life of sex. In this article we are informed with statistics of men and women whom admit as to why they regret their past encounters. The article also explains scenarios of cases where sexual encounters break relationships and marriages. The biggest questioned raised by Matt Huston in his article is “When it comes to sexual misadventures, why do we feel so wrong about that which, in the heat of the moment, felt so right?” (Huston 39). Huston suggests that people feel thrill when having encounters rather than casual sex.
What is there to regret of sex? Women who lose their virginity in a sexual encounter regret it because they feel like they lost their pureness to the wrong man. Women also regret having sexual encounters because they feel like they moved too fast to jump into sex. Men have other type of regrets. There are men who regret no jumping into bed and having sex with a random person. There are men who regret not being more sexually active in their youth. On a survey done to men and women, 55% of men regret not having sexual encounters. 48% of men regret not being sexually active at a young age. 43% of women regret moving too fast and jumping into sex. 41% of women regret losing their virginity to the wrong person.
Both men and women regret things differently. Women regret most of their past sexual encounters while men regret not having more sexual encounters. A very interesting study done in the Journal of Sex research, finds that regardless of sex, both genders that engage in sex with relative strangers may actually be more anxious and depressed. Another impactful statistic is that more than 70% of “college students who’d had a one-night stand had also experienced sexual regret” (39).
This magazine article is very informative. It really doesn’t persuade people not to have sexual encounters; it just informs us about the people who regret sexual encounters. The magazine’s job is to inform us of a topic that really isn’t talked about on a daily basis. One can say that this magazine is sending out a subliminal message, which is to think before we engage in sexual encounters. The magazine believes that this generation has changed the idea of sex and has created a new a separate type of sex called sexual encounters. It also shows how many of these people show regret for past encounters.
While shopping at Target I looked around and saw the books and magazines sections. I decided to buy a National Geographic magazine. The cover had an interesting hook; it basically said that Aliens weren’t far from earth. I bought the magazine and read the article, however, it didn’t finish the article when I decided to return the magazine to the store. The article was very boring, the language wasn’t clear to understand, and the text became boring the further I read. I went back to Target and looked around for another magazine and I decided to look at Psychology Today.
My initial article to write my essay was on “Daydreams” and how those fantasies affect our futures. As I flipped through the magazine I came across the topic of sex. I read the title and I felt a relation to that topic. We’re college students and we know people whom participate in sexual encounters. Sexual encounters are something that is incredibly popular in college and especially at parties and clubs. It is interesting to know how both men and women feel after sexual encounters.
Before I read this article I had no opinion on sexual encounters. I have a few friends whom participate in this type of acts. I always tell them to use protection and avoid stupid mistakes. I don’t judge people, everyone makes mistakes and many of us keep making mistakes. After I read this article it hit me. I used to believe that when someone engages in sexual encounters they aren’t sensitive and don’t have emotional feelings. But this magazine proved me wrong. Men and women do feel regret; their regret differs but they still feel regret based on a sexual encounter.
I don’t regret reading this article because it really caught my attention. I scanned the article and emailed it to some of my friends. I was really amazed with the research that explained that most of the people who participate in sexual encounters are anxious and depressed. It is rude to ask personal questions to people but I’d be very interested in knowing if they are anxious or depressed.
If I ever feel the necessity of participating in a sexual encounter I will think back to this article and analyze the moment. Drugs and alcohol are not our friends and intoxication can make us do things we wouldn’t do when sober. I would also think of the statistics of people whom regret the sexual encounters. This article has made me realize that there is a negative effect on sexual encounters, there is more to than just sex. Sex involves feelings. I think that every college student should read this article. Many people could prevent feeling regretful if they read an interesting article like this one.
Huston, Matt. “If I Could Do It All Over Again.” Psychology Today 1 Mar. 2014: 37-39. Print.