Sorry, but copying text is forbidden on this website!
During the past twenty years of my life, I was always regarding my parents as extraordinary and authoritative models of my life. I adored them so much as if everything they had done was not only right but also great. As for my parents, they paid much attention to setting a good example for me since I was a little girl. The situation lasts and I have never thought of any possible changes in the relationship between my parents and me. However, after reading the passage Predictable Crises of Adulthood written by Gail Sheehy, my old understanding of parents-children relationship is replaced by a totally new one —- nothing remains unchanged forever and the parents-children relationship is no exception. Actually, there are changes in my relationship although I did not detect them before reading the passage. As I mentioned above, my parents were regarded as the models of my life and this impression was established firmly from my early childhood, influencing me greatly during the past years.
In my eyes, they were so preeminent that they could have everything done well. In fact, they were intent on setting an example to me by building up such kind of holy and authoritative image in my mind. However, as I was growing up, I gradually found that my parents were not the God. It was impossible for them to control everything in life and sometimes they were confronted with difficulties. In the recent years, with the broadening of my horizons, I gain my own beliefs, some of which are quite differently from that of my parents. I find that they are no long as holy and remote as they used to be. Now my parents and I am sharing a more equal relationship. On the one hand, they respect my opinions, treating me as an adult. On the other hand, I would like to consult with them whenever I am confronted with difficulties.
Therefore, the relationship between my parents and me has changed. They are no long holy and authoritative, but amiable and friendly. They are more like my friends rather than parents. In the next decade when I become a mother, my relationship with parents will be likely to get into a new stage. My parents are such good models of my life that I firmly believe that they are excellent and extraordinary parents. As a result, it is quite possible for me to develop similar parenting pattern. Also, my parents will certainly offer me suggestions whenever I am confused. The role of my parents in the relationship changes again.
At this stage, they will become my model in terms of parenting. At the last stage of their life, parents may become too old to take good care of themselves. Thus, special care for them will be needed, which will wholly shift the relationship between my parents and me. There exists an interesting phenomenon: the senior tend to become more childlike when they are getting older and older, while their children, who are at the best stage in their life, become the reliance of their parents.
Thus, the roles of my parents and I will exchange as the process of life. I, in return, will take care of my old parents just as they took care of me years ago. The relationship will go to the opposite side of the one in the earlier stage of life. Except for the love between parents and children, nothing remains unchanged forever. The relationship between parents and children changes as the stage of life processes. These changes are inevitable, just as the life cycle goes on. We should accept the changes positively and face them bravely. Only by adopting the right relationship at the right stage can one lives a better life with the relationship between parents and children.