Developing the Social Aspect of Your Personality

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The personality of a person is shown by his or her pattern of habits, attitude and relationship which can be acquired by anyone through experiences as a result of the influence of environment. This social aspect of personality is important because it implies the personality can be developed, altered, or improved.

THE INFLUENCE OF ENVIRONMENT IN YOUR SOCIAL BEHAVIOR

Social environment plays such an important role in determining a person’s personality that it makes a difference what a man does for a living and even where one lives.

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IMPORTANCE OF STUDYING SOCIAL GRACES

1.Knowledge of accepted social graces gives people increased self – confidence. 2.Knowledge of good manners increases a person’s sense of security, poise and self – respect. 3.Once you know the rules of etiquette, you will be able to know what is expected from you. 4.Knowledge of good manners will help you do much easy what is expected from you. 5.Knowing good manners will help you get along well with different kinds of people.

ETIQUETTE – consists of a set of rules of living on our society. Etiquette is a way of treating others as you would like others to treat you with respect and thoughtfulness. BUSINESS ETIQUETTE – these are the set of certain patterns of considerate interaction when doing business of any kind business etiquette are cleared guidelines on how to act in any business situation having to do with a person’s job. SOCIAL GRACES – more popularly known as good manners and etiquette. MANNERS – are social conduct and rules of conduct.

Manners are the manifestation of courteous behavior in various situations.

GOOD MANNERS AT HOME

1.At home, we should practice the social amenities of living so that we will be used to doing them when we are in public. 2.At home, you should have in order to create an atmosphere of mutual respect, trust and love. 3.At home, it is very important that we treat each member of the family with love and respect. Do not take each other for granted. 4.Every member of the family is entitled to his/her own share of privacy. 5.Never violate the privacy of your family or relatives by opening their mails without their permission. 6.A close door in your home should be respected. Knock and wait for the answer before entering. 7.Every member of the family is to have the privilege of entertaining his own friends with a minimum or interference from the rest of the family. 8.Always be courteous to elders, even to children and the house helpers.

9.Avoid borrowing personal belongings of your parent, brothers and sisters. Ask permission if you need to do so. 10.Wherever you wish to go, ask permission and inform your parents about your where with whom you are going. This is also for your security reason and for your safety so your parents can trace your whereabouts. 11.Respect the feelings of your parents, brothers and sisters at all times. Obedience to do what is right is an indicator of respect. 12.Avoid snooping or listening in to the conversation of other members of the family, either over the telephone or when one is entertaining a visitor in the house.

GOOD MANNERS IN SCHOOL

1.Maintain good attendance record. 2.Report regularly and be on time for all your classes. Notify your teacher and classmates are case you cannot come to class due to some reasonable causes, like sickness or some emergency at home. 3.Do your homework and assignment at home so you will really have enough time to prepare them well. Do not do your assignment inside the classroom while discussion is going on. 4.Know and follow all your school rules and regulation.

5.Wear the prescribed uniform and ID if that is your school regulation. Wearing of uniform and proper ID is for safety precaution so that NO OUTSIDERS, who can badly influence you, can enter the school campus. Wearing of ID and the school uniform is for your protection so the school authorities can identify readily who does not belong. 6.Try to uphold the good name of your school by bringing honor in various competitions. 7.Participate actively in all classroom discussions. Take the opportunity to enhance your leadership traits. 8.Participate in all your school activities. Join various school organizations as part of your leadership training. 9.Strive to achieve academic excellence in all your subjects. 10. Read a lot and learn to listen and share ideas especially during classroom discussion. You will learn a lot by reading and listening. 11.Wait for your turn to talk when you want to share something worthwhile. 12.Be polite and respectful at all times.

GOOD MANNERS IN PUBLIC

1.The best way to improve the manners in public is for each of us to follow the “Golden Rule”. Do not do unto others what you do not want to do unto you or Do unto others what you would want others do unto you. 2.Do not push your way into the public conveyances. Fall in line and wait for your turn. 3.Do not cut ahead of others on a ticket line.

4.Sit properly inside a public transportation so that others may be comfortably seated.
5.Close the door quietly in public.
6.Do not comb your hair in public.
7.Do not spit or pick your nose in public.
8.Do not clean your fingernails and scrape off nail polish in public. 9.Woman should not smoke in public.
10.Avoid long introduction or conversation on the street and the conveyances to avoid human traffic along the way. 11.Remain quite in the theater to allow others to enjoy themselves. 12.Treat sales clerk and other service personnel with respect and consideration.

RESTAURANT MANNERS

1.In a restaurant, the waiter usually comes forward for assistance. The woman, therefore, should allow the waiter. 2.When there is no waiter, the man precedes the woman and leads her to a convenient place. 3.After choosing the location, man should pull out a chair and should help sit the woman. If there is a waiter, this is usually done by the waiter. 4.The man should sit the woman where she can have a good view of the place. She should not be seated where passing people may strike her chair. She should not also be seated facing a wall or a swinging door. 5.If you are going out in a group of four, the men should sit on the aisle seats and the woman should be with their back on the wall. 6.If you are going out with two men, the women should sit between them. 7.In this modern time, the woman can direct her order to the waiter when she is ask for her preferences. Before it was not in good taste for the woman to order directly.

8.When you are unfamiliar with the restaurant and its specialties, you can ask the waiter to recommend some of its specialties. If there are unfamiliar listings on the menu, it is all right to ask for clarification. 9.Calling of the waiter needs a certain degree of politeness. You may use the following suggestions: a.Watch his eyes and then raise your hand as if to say “Come here”. b.You may call quietly “waiter” or “waitress” without making a scene. c.If your waiter is far away or if you don’t remember your remember your waiter, ask another waiter nearby to call him for you. d.Never clay your hands or tap the table with spoon when calling the waiter. e.Avoid whistling or calling the waiter “Pssssst”.

10.When paying the bill, check the orders made and the computations. If there are no mistakes, return it together with the payment. 11.If you find an error in the bill, request politely for proper adjustment. If the management doesn’t seem to care, simply pay the bill, but do not return to that restaurant again. 12.When you are satisfied with the service of the waiter, you can give 5% or 10% tip out of the total bill. 13.If the bill contains a service charge, you may or you may not give an extra tip for the waiter. It all depends on the kind of service the waiter has given you. If you are satisfied and generous enough, you can give an extra tip to recognize “a job well done.”

14.The woman should avoid extensive making up in public especially in restaurant. She should go to the powder room while the man is paying the bill. 15.Avoid long chat when you see people whom you know in a restaurant. A simple hello will do the job. You may ask for the telephone number or better still you may leave your contact numbers where you can continue your conversation. 16.But when introduction are necessary, the man should stand when a woman is being introduced. But when a woman is introduced to a man or another woman, the latter remain seated. 17.When a man talks to just one man the other man does not stand. If the conversation will take some time, let the man take the seat and join you.

TABLE MANNERS

1.Sit erect at the table. Do not lean your elbows on the table while waiting for your orders to arrive. 2.When eating, the head should be bowed down slightly, but not too low to your plate. 3.Carry the food directly to the mouth. Do not stop halfway to talk. 4.Do not talk if your mouth is full. Finish the food in your mouth before you talk. 5.Chew with your mouth closed, and chew the food thoroughly to enjoy the taste of the food. 6.When cutting meat, hold the fork in the left hand, tines down, with the handle touching the palm of your hand, and cut the meat into bite pieces with knife on your right hand. 7.Hold the knife and correctly. There are two eating styles that are acceptable. They are the: a.AMERICAN STYLE: You cut the meat with the knife on the right hand and eat the fork in the left hand. You cut, spear, and bring the meat to your mouth with the fork

. b.CONTINENTAL STYLE: With your right hand, cut the meat into several bite pieces. You put down the knife after cutting by placing it on the upper portion of the plate. Transfer the fork to your right hand to spear the meat, and then bring the meat to the mouth. 8.Don’t blow in the soup in the cup to cool it. Wait until cool enough to eat. Spoon the soup away from you to avoid accidental spill on your clothes. 9.Cut bread into bite pieces with your hands and put some butter with the knife on the right hand and bring the buttered bread (bit pieces) to your mouth to eat with your left thumb and index fingers. 10.If you accidentally drop your silverware, apologize briefly and ask for a replacement.

Don’t attempt to pick it up. 11.Food eaten with fork. Remember, food is to be lifted upon the fork, nor speared are meat, fish, poultry (when served cut). 12.Food eaten with fingers are bread, sandwiches, celery, olives, radishes, nuts, cookies, bits size chunks of cheese, apples chicken (when poultry is served whole.) 13.If the food you want to take is far from your place, you may request the person near it by saying, “Please pass the chicken”. 14.To remove bones in your mouth, cover it with a napkin and get it with your hand using the index and the thumb fingers. 15.After eating, arrange the fork and spoon on top of your plate in one place, preferably on the right side of the plate and return the cloth napkin on the top of the table.

MANNERS IN DATING

1.Your parent should be informed as to whom and where you are going out dating. This is an indication of respect for your parents. 2.Seeing each other at a designated place from your home is permissible, but do not make it too often. You should always let your parents or guardians know the man with whom you are going with for security reason or for your safety. 3.For women, avoid wearing seductive attire so as not to arouse the man’s basic instincts. 4.Learn to control your emotion yourself. Do not do things which are done only by married couple, you will later regret because you are not yet ready for the responsibilities.

5.To be treated like a lady, requires a lady like behavior. 6.In this modern age when dating expenses can be shared when both the man and the woman are working. However, good manner dictates that the man is responsible in shouldering expenses if he was the one who ask for the date. 7.A lady should not telephone a man unnecessarily. Most man will get upset if the woman makes the first move. Ladies, it is still part of good manners to wait for the man to call you. 8.Let the man be the one to ask for the date.

9.A woman should wait for her escort to open the door, pick up drop articles and help in the car. 10.When entering the restaurant, remember that when there is a waiter the woman should precede the man by following the waiter; when there is no waiter, the man should precede the woman so that he can look for a vacant table. 11.When entering the entrance door of a restaurant, good manners dictates that the man should open the door for the woman. The woman should give chance for the man to open the door for her. 12.In going out dating, be considerate of the pocket of your escort. Avoid ordering too expensive on the menu. However, you should also avoid ordering the cheapest food on the menu. 13.Etiquette dictates that you have to finish all the food you ordered.

14.The man should stay on the danger side when walking and crossing the street. 15.When riding a jeep or bus, the woman should precede the escort. 16.When from a jeep or bus the escort should get out first before the woman and guide the woman down. 17.During dating, avoid doing things being done only by married couple. It is very hard to regret at the end. Remember: “TRUE LOVE KNOWS HOW TO WAIT”. 18.Go to the places where you will have the chance to meet different people. In this way, you’ll have the chance to know the person better. Chaperone should also be treated with concern and respect so that they can also enjoy your company.

19.Do not limit yourselves to seeing a movie where it is dark and minimum interaction or conversation can take place. Go to various places where you can talk, discuss, share ideas, and even plan for your future. Observe his or her behavior particularly so that you will be able to know what kind of person he or she really is. 20.Dating is an opportunity for you to know each other better. Do not do anything that will destroy the trust of your parents. Use dating to develop your friendship with one another with clean wholesome form of entertainment to make you both better people.