There is an adage that says, ‘No man is an island’. Every man or woman if I am permitted is sustained by some form of some form of interaction with people. Man was made for it, so to live without it is like taking a fish out of its natural habitat. What do you expect from such a fish? It will surely die. You ever wonder what the world would look like without somebody to lean on, talk to, and share your feelings with. One could explode carrying all that ‘burden’ on one’s mind. Even from the religious perspective, the Bible has it that God made man for himself, so he could talk relate to someone.
You wonder if God needed relationship, why we would not need it more. All social intercourse between human beings is a response of personality to personality, grading upwards from the most casual brush from people to people to the fullest, and most intimate of which the human soul is capable. An interpersonal relationship is simply a person to person association between two or more people. This could be a love relationship (marriage), family, work, and people living in your neighbourhood etc.
In this kind of relationship, there is some level of interpersonal knowledge where both parties have certain knowledge of the other person(s) involved. In all of these relationships, on thing is evident, there is a bond or a tie formed between them. In other words, interpersonal relationships are about meeting the needs of one another. Not limiting this interpersonal relationship idea to man alone, even animals and plants. In Biology, we were taught Symbiosis as a form of relationship existing between algae and Fungi. Even the plants need each other to live.
We see that every form of life is sustained by some form of relationship(s). These relationships also have their effects on us, either positively or negatively. Take a sample study on people who engage in interpersonal relationship, you will notice a rubbing off that occurs in both parties. You see that each one picks some attitudes of the other and exhibits them unconsciously. And you wonder, how did that happen? Every interpersonal relationship operates by certain principles which we overlook. People just don’t become intimate or close all of a sudden. It begins with a law called ATTRACTION.
Since relationships are choices we make individually and not forcibly, we naturally relate with people we are physically attracted to. Spending QUALITY TIME with the other party involved. Taking a marriage relationship for example, one major reason for the break ups that we see in marriages is the lack of spending quality time with the other party. This leaves the other party very lonely, and this could open the door for infidelity and a lot more. Since we said earlier that relationships is about meeting needs, then NOT BEING SELFISH also helps develop interpersonal relationships.
The key to a good interpersonal relationship is simple once you understand the role that needs play in making a relationship weak, moderate, average, or strong. Relationships are strong when there is a ‘give and take’ rule in operation ‘Relationship deterioration refers to the weakening of the bonds that hold people together. This happens when both parties are currently unhappy with the state of things. Among the causes of the deterioration include: financial problems, sex-related problems, work –related problems, third-party relationships and many more’.
For the fact that one has problems in interpersonal relationships does not make you the first person with issues, neither does it make you a failure. What we need to do is to put the matter on the table, settle issues and make things work between us. This is the key to every long standing relationship till now and will always be. References: Goldman, B (2008), “Improving Interpersonal relationships. ” Pearson, A (2008), ‘Interpersonal Relationships: Growth and Deterioration -The Interpersonal Communication Book. Tanner, D. (1990) Women and men in conversation. New York: Ballantine Books. Doyle, T (2000). Types of Interpersonal Relationships