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Horney’s theory Essay

1. Samara demonstrates Horney’s “moving towards” neurosis meaning she deals with anxiety by an excessive interest in being accepted, needed, and approved of. We first learn this in the first paragraph where it says, “she is sensitive to the needs of others.” She is constantly looking for a boy to accept her and does all that she can to make sure he is happy. An example of this would be when she cooks him big dinners and only goes to see movies he will like to. She get very bad anxiety when her boyfriends would hang out with other girls, which would lead her to become very possessive.

2. According to Horney’s theory, what leads Samara’s neurotic behavior is her tendency to take on a dependent role compared to others and her unlimited desire for love. “Moving towards” people see others as potential resources who can support them and help reduce their anxiety of being along so they seek love, approval, and someone to get close with in order to save them.

3. Samara’s self-image is not an accurate one. She does not have a very accurate idea of who she is. She is very insecure and relies on other people to help build her up therefore she is not able to realize her own potential and achieve self-realization. According to Horney’s theory, there is a discrepancy between Samara’s idealized self versus the real image of herself. Samara’s idealized self was created to overcome Samara’s feelings of inferiority and makes her try and possess all great qualities. This is the reason she is doing everything in her power to make her boyfriend at the time happy and doing all things for him. It is also the reason that Samara never thinks she is doing anything wrong. On the other hand, Samara’s real self is the reason behind all of her self-criticism and hate that is driving her towards always needing to be loved. Her ideal self is taking over her real self and is what is controlling her behavior and actions.

4. For Samara, there is a huge discrepancy between her organismic self and her perceived self. Samara’s organismic self is who she actually is, so she according to the reading Samara is someone is comes across as very insecure, demanding, lonely, and protective. She tries too hard to make her boyfriends happy. Her ideal self is the person she really thinks she is. Samara never understands why boys don’t love her and why she isn’t married yet even though us as readers could tell right away what the issues were. Samara doesn’t understand her organismic self and that is what is causing Samara’s loneliness.

5. Another theory that could be useful in describing Samara is Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, which states that people possess a set of motivation systems unrelated to rewards to unconscious desires. Samara is constantly looking to make herself happy and is relying on other things besides her own self to become happy. According to this theory Samara is stuck on the level of love and belonginess needs meaning she is seeking friendship, intimacy, affection and love. The reading says that Samara is rarely ever alone because once her and a boy break up she immediately goes on to another boy.

6. Carl Roger’s phenomenological theory is something that could change how Samara saw herself, her boyfriends, and how she acted towards her boyfriends. The concept of self-actualization refers to someone moving from a dependent person to an independent person and focuses on someone reducing their tension and their needs, which will help bring them more pleasures and satisfaction. Right now, Samara is also tense because she is worry about how to make another person happy hoping that their happiness will make sure they keep loving her. If Samara were to develop more confidence and trust she would be able to see all the good things she has going on and all of her strengths that will allow her to become a more independent person. Once she is able to do that she will be able to find someone else who will love her and they can have a much more healthy relationship than she has had in the past.

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