Whenever the thought of domestic violence comes to mind, more than often the visual picture is a women or a child. However, there is another side that has been ignored because it is pushed under the rug. The unfortunate fact is that men are the victims of domestic violence at least as often as women are. While the very idea of men is being beaten by their wives or partners runs contrary to many of our deeply ingrained beliefs about men and women, female or male violence against men is a well-documented phenomenon almost completely ignored by both the media and society (Watson 2013).
The majority of male victims do not report being abused because of the fear that people will not believe them. Men are also silent on the issue because of society’s automatic perception that men are physically stronger and should easily be able to overcome a female attacker. Countless stories tell of men who are physically abused by women calling the police only to be arrested themselves when the police arrive. One story tells of a man being driven to the hospital by the police after his wife struck him with a frying pan as he slept; the wife was not arrested.
Many men who experience violence from their wives during marriage are advised not to bring up such incidents in their divorce proceedings because the court may consider it an act of violence against the wife. In these cases, perception takes center stage and allows women to get away with abuse while men pay the unjust consequences. The children isolate themselves, want go to school, lying to protect the family, acting out, even bed wetting. In the long run those children that are witnessing the violence can be come abusive themselves. A family under stress produces children under stress” (Ackerman & Pickering1989).
In America about 3 million children witness some type domestic violence. Children that witness domestic violence in the home are at risk of being battered themselves either by the batterer or by the victim. The long term effects of such violence can create a cycle that spans from generation to generation. Facts show 1 in 6 women and 1 in 33 men have experience an attempted or completed rape. Three women are killed by a current or former intimate partner each day in America, on average.
Over 22 percent of women to 7. 4 percent of men reported being physically assaulted by a current or former partner in their lifetime. Women who were physically assaulted by an intimate partner averaged 6. 9 physical assaults per year, 37% of women seeking injury-related treatment in hospital emergency rooms were there because of injuries inflicted by a current or formal spouse/partner. Women are at an increased risk of harm shortly after separation from an abusive partner. As previously mentioned, the majority of statistics show that women are victims of domestic violence.
However, here are some more facts according to the Domestic Violence against Men. It 100 domestic violence cases, 40% of these were against men, 60% against women. In a 1995 to 1996 study conducted by the U. S. Department of Justice (as published in 2000), out of 8,000 women 25% were subjected to domestic violence. Out of the 8,000 men 7. 5% were also victims of domestic violence. The same 1995 to 1996 study estimated that, annually, in the U. S. , about 1. 5 million women and around 830,000 men are victims of domestic violence.
That’s almost a 2:1 ratio of women versus men who were subjected to domestic violence. ”(Graham-Kevan, 2013). On the other hand, several conflicts destroy a relationship. The biggest conflicts that seem more widely publicized and always at the forefront are infidelity, poor financial handling, sex, children and abuse. Seemingly, abuse is something that is more tolerated and unmentioned as a code of silence on both sides of the relationship. According to (Tjaden, P& Thoennes, N 1998) women are more likely to report abuse than men.
Usually this is the case because the victim are too ashamed to mention the abuse, and unless either witnessed or displays visible signs of abuse it will be tolerated until the victim has had enough, or until death occurs. Guilt most often what keeps the victim, at the hands of their abuser, that internal turmoil that the victim goes through with leaving the since of feeling responsible, the feeling of leaving the relationship and the household, this alone is the underlying reasons behind not leaving, not wanting to separate the household.
Self-blame can not be avoided for some of those who believe that they just have not done enough, the only thing that will help is time, distance and healing and too not get into another relationship until they are completely ready. It is estimated that about 3. 2 million men are victims of assault by their partner each year in the United States. However, most of these assaults are relatively minor, such as hitting, smacking, pushing, and shoving, others are much more serious. It has raised serious questions about “implementation of arrest policies, equivalency of intimate partner aggression across genders, and management of female domestic violence offenders.
This study compares demographic characteristics, criminal history variables, and the past domestic violence history of men and women arrested for domestic assault against a heterosexual intimate partner. Using victim reported information and data collected by local criminal justice agencies, we found that female arrestees were significantly less likely than males to have histories that warrant concern regarding the potential for future violence. (Henning, K. , & Feder, L. 2004, 19(2), 69-80).
The warning signs to look for in domestic violence. Many of the signs women are taught to interpret as caring, attentive, and romantic are actually early warning signs f or future abuse. Here are some examples which includes constantly asks were you are going or were you at. Insists on you spend most of you time with cutting you off from family and friends. Accuses you of infidelity. Gets extremely anger when things do not go their way and speak negative of other women.
With men there are no signs for them to follow the advice that I have is to watch for some of the same things that women look out for. Some may even result in homicide by the same partner. The main goal is to strengthen families through treatment, counseling and education; suggestions involved mandating intervention Programs for men and women, couples’ counseling, mediation, and judicial trainings, by implementing these helpful systems, it would be more effective towards the decrease of domestic abuse, and assist with repair of the mental capacity of the abused and the family in a whole.
In most domestic violence issues it usually is a woman but has you can see men are also victims of domestic violence. Domestic violence could be even eradicated or all together dismissed. Society is beginning to realize that domestic violence is an increasingly growing issue and must continue to work towards implementing programs to decrease it within the home. Domestic violence is not a private matter, a couple’s matter, or a domestic squabble. It is the choice of the abuser. Domestic violence is a way for a person to control another person.
Courtney from Study Moose
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