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Confucian Parenting Essay

Throughout history, the Confucian style of parenting has gained the attention of many parents in Asian countries. This authoritative style of parenting began in the Asian country of China. The whole idea of Confucian parenting is based on Confucianism, which is a culture based on proverbs and teachings of their leader, Confucius. Traditional Chinese and Confucius culture emphasizes strong interdependent relationship between parents and children.

The traditional belief [of Confucian parenting] is that if parents assist children with their educational opportunities and advancement, their children, as adults, will be in a solid position to care for them in old age (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement). Based on Confucianism, Chinese parental involvement in education shows a positive influence in grades, child development, and future people skills. In Chinese parenting, grades are the utmost important value in life.

Grades shows a child’s progress in not only school, but also in life in general. Believing education as the beginning [step] on the ladder leading to future success and better life, Chinese parents try their best to provide their only child with the best education (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement). Before a child goes to school, parents insist on teaching their children the basics of Confucius teachings. One of the Confucius teachings say that complete and utmost respect for elders is always expected (Hoobler, Thomas 15).

Freyre 1 Since the children know this they are more likely to excel in learning by showing respect and attention towards their teachers. Respect for teachers and the school environment show an upward gain in grades and academics. In Chinese people’s minds, teachers are the only experts in the educational field and therefore deserve much respect. This notion is best reflected in the old Chinese idiom, “One day your/my teacher, forever your/my parent. (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement).

This kind of respect is shown upon the student and their interactions with the teacher. It is the parent’s responsibility to keep the teacher happy with the student, thus the parents will teach positive Confucian proverbs. Chinese people believe the conflict between parents and teachers will leave a negative influence on children’s attitudes towards school and learning leading to a decrease in academic performance (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement). When the child gets home the parents attention is still focused on education.

For example, parents have casual conversations with their child about the school day, and they spend some time helping with homework and reading to the child before bedtime (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement). When Chinese parents get involved in education at home, they focus much more on child’s academic progress than the development in other fields, such as physical, emotional and social development (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement).

Parents don’t only teach to their child the importance of academics, but they also teach the importance of basic child development. Just like earlier Confucianism, respect for elders is expected but not just for children in families but expected among everyone (Hoobler, Thomas 124). Freyre 2 Children know to respect any adult they are approached by and do so by doing what they’re taught by their parents. If the children fail to administer the rules they are taught, they will be disciplined. Discipline, for these parents, is less about punishment and more about the child learning from mistakes (Hoobler, Thomas & Dorothy 156).

Children who did not obey the rules were scolded and warned not to do so again even in a minor offence such as laughing or staring at adults (Hoobler, Thomas & Dorothy 158). As a child matures, Confucian parents allow for greater independence while at the same time requiring children to take on greater responsibilities (Authoritative Parenting Style). Both independence and responsibility in a Chinese child’s early life will later benefit their adult life by teaching them values. Chinese parents, though authoritative, do believe in a child’s independence.

It is said to be important that a Confucian child should know responsibility and how to treat others in an open environment. Confucian children are taught by their parents to play an instrument (most likely piano or violin) and to be individuals. In contrast, Chinese parents place a high value on obedience and conformity, favoring more punitive, absolute, and forceful disciplinary measures. Verbal give- and-take is not common in authoritarian households, because the underlying belief of authoritarian parents is that the child should accept without question the rules and standards established by the parents.

They tend not to encourage independent behavior and, instead, place a good deal of importance on restricting the child’s autonomy (New horizons and challenges in China’s public schools for parent involvement). Though conformity is frowned upon in many social standards, knowing these skills a Chinese child will be able to fit into the social world easily. Freyre 3 In conclusion, to this day Chinese parental involvement in education shows a positive influence in grades, Child Development, and future people skills. Chinese parents’ teachings, based on Confucian ideals, show prominent success in Chinese children.

By raising Chinese children to respect their elders, be responsible, and conform to society, parents build a strong future for their child. Thus, the authoritative style of parenting is the most optimal style that tends to produce mature, socially competent children and adolescents. As children make the transition from childhood to adolescence, the authoritative style remains the most effective parenting style because it offers sufficient autonomy necessary to foster internal control among adolescents while also offering sufficient controls to foster responsibility.


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